July 28, 2024
Hi.
I normally don’t do this. I don’t know how to write good letters but I just wanted to let you know that this IS a letter. To you.
I had a considerable amount of hobbies as a kid, you know? As some of my friends know, I was a (horrible) volleyball player as a kid, i tried gymnastics too, because I liked the sparkly costumes… But one thing that I really, really liked to do was writing short stories. And absolutely no one used to understand why was that. None of my teachers got why on earth a child was writing a story about a rabbit who had to die to teach his father a lesson about morals. Because… what the fuck. I was eight. And you can really guess I wasn’t a hit near the other kids. I was the owner of the Barbie that had the irrepressible thoughts of death. Because people die on the daily and no one seems to know what happens or care or…?????
All I’ve had my entire life was a large pile of short stories and a conviction that one day, it was going to work out, because my mom would always say to me that no one is alone forever. We all get to have a chance to find the people that are exactly meant for us. I knew someone out there felt the same exact things that i did. I knew someone out there yearned for a voice as much as i did. And if you’re reading this, it means it worked out. It worked out because me and you are a TEAM now. We always were.
And because of you, my life has never been crazier. And i mean that in THE BEST way fucking possible.
And in the midst of all this craziness, i’ve been called crazy, funny, controversial, cool, hypocritical and many, many more amazing compliments, and then insults, and then compliments again. I’ve inspired posts, poems and even songs?? Crazy. But cool.
And i just wanted to let you know that I’m happy to be called things, I’m happy to engage with your life for whatever reason, and I’m most happy by having a positive impact. I’m happy if you consider me something. My friend Jen said she finds me to be a mix of cotton candy and a librarian! How accurate is that?! Very accurate. Give me a voice in your head, give me substance, give me space in your heart. I’d like that. I’ve been told that i’ve been read by a very sweet father and his daughter, which heals me because it reminds me of my relationship with my own father, I’ve been told I was a subject at some of your dinner table conversations, which is crazy, because I’ve never expected to be the main subject in a conversation, ever. You don’t know how complete you make little eight year old Amanda, who didn’t know exactly how to engage in conversations and constantly dodged them, because she had many things to say but just didn’t know how to. You have the power to heal me, just from where you are right now, and I just have the dream and desire to even wish to make the same thing for you.
My thank you is long, long overdue. I know that. But I just wanted to let you, personally, know that I love you so much. You, behind the screen. None of this would be even possible without you, and without all of my other friends behind their screens. You give me a voice, and you give me the opportunity to be here, writing to you. I love you so much, you made my dream come true.
With you, and with Substack, I’ve learnt that there are still people willing to have a meaningful conversation about many things, all things possible. I’ve learnt that there is space for everybody, and I’ve learnt that there are still, kind and beautiful people in this world, who will lift you back up when you fall, tell you when you’ve fucked up and help you grow even more after that. And these people are individuals that I’m now lucky enough to call my friends.
And if you don’t mind, I’d like to thank some of them, too.
First and foremost, a big thank you to
. I feel like I totally wouldn't be here without your mind. Lol. You inspire me so much, and I really would like to thank you for your writing, for your kindness and for your friendship.I would also like to thank
, for being a fucking legend, and for inspiring me so much with her greatness and strength. You move me so much and I take your words with me, in my heart and in my soul.My substack WIFE,
,who is the most talented and the kindest person you'll ever have the pleasure of interacting with, besides being the most supportive person in the whole wide world. I love you so much and I’ll always be here for you. Our friendship bracelet is tattooed in my heart. , for being so supportive and for being a true friend. I genuinely love our conversations and our friendship. You colored my world all pastel and it's beautiful. , me and you were love at first sight and i'm glad we stuck together. Look at us now!!, for simply being herself . You are my biggest inspiration, and I need to thank you a million times. Your talent is enough to move me to write more. , you’re simply excellent in literally everything that you do, and finding your words was enough for me to start writing here. Even though you are a literal goddess, you still found some time to be the sweetest, nicest person ever.
And many more people that are definitely missing from this post, but you definitely know who you all are. One thing about me is that I WILL let you know that you've had an impact in my life.
Also, thank you to all my dear, dear friends that I've made because they decided to take some time to share their stories and their insightful ideas and visions in my comment section.
I love you all so, so much. I hope you hold me close to your heart as i hold you all in mine.
All my posts are dedicated to all of you, but the reason I post is to encourage you. Do it. It's so worth it. In my generation, not very much is stable. We lose jobs and move cities in the snap of a finger, micro trends come and go but our core never goes away. It never goes away. Writing is what I do, is an expression of my core. And it will never go away. I wake up with it and go to bed with it. I change jobs and cities with it. And i love it. Don't even get me started on talking about love.
Love can appear in your life in so many different and unexpected ways, and this was mine. I’m so very thankful to spread a message of love for writing and, more importantly, a love for people. I’m most thankful to have an opportunity to be kind to people every single day, because there is always a person who needs your words and your encouragement. I’m happy to be that person to some of you, but ,most of all, I’m happy to spend some time with you every Sunday.
Thanks to you, TCRD is read in 42 US States and 82 Countries. I love you.
Your friend,
Amanda H.
Ahhhhhhh!!! Amanda you're the best of the best, i swear. So fuckin well deserved! Excited to see you sell a book to penguin random house sometime down the line lol
🥹🌹🫶